I could save myself a lot of effort running up and down stairs by acquiring a pigeon-proof bird feeder. Or I could summon the power of technology . . .
I suspect healthy disgruntlement is somewhere near the apex of life's achievements anyway. We have a neighbour who exhibits unhealthy disgruntlement: he is utterly obsessed with pigeons and does indeed shoot them with his air rifle, often annoying the rest of us when one occasionally lands in our garden. But he generally has a lord-of-the-manor complex. I have sometimes wondered about putting a copy of Patrick Suskind's novella The Pigeon through his letterbox - it's about a man obsessed with a pigeon.
What about Two feeder tables With a piece of Covid Perspex in between them Blah! Blah! Bla etc!